The New Normal

My sweet little sleeper!

This time last year I was home on maternity leave, snuggling with Tommy, trying to figure out the whole nursing thing, and thinking I could maintain everything I was doing before Tommy was born, before I found out I was pregnant. I think it took me about 3-4 weeks before it hit me that was not going to be the case for some things. Others, I have gradually realized AND more importantly, ACCEPTED over the past 12 months. I wouldn't be getting my nails done every 2 weeks, and I wouldn't be able to fix them every night they needed a fixin'. (I'm a little OCD about having chipped nail polish). I would not be going to the gym 3-4 nights a week. I would not be going out for last minute happy hours after work. I would not be working til 7, 8, 9pm the week of a football game. I would not be going to the beach as often as I thought I might with a baby. I would not be reading as many books as quickly as I once did.

But you know what? It's okay.

There are so many things that I can do now.

I can function on a lot less sleep than I thought I could (though admittedly, we've been lucky compared to many folks I've heard about!)

I can (and did) get accustomed to having light colors on my nails so that the chips aren't that noticable (though it is autumn, and I admit I'm wearing some dark colors these days, and my nails are looking a bit trashy today with the chipped polish...!)

I can (and do) my nails sometimes at 11pm IN BED. Out the Door topcoat is THE BEST.

I can (and do) walk as part of my workouts. Still not as often as I'd like. Sometimes Tommy joins me in the stroller, sometimes I squeeze it in at lunch during the day. Not quite the same as kickboxing or spin class, but it's something.

I can get myself out the door by 5pm from work...something that was impossible before I was a mommy. I am a more productive person in the office since returning to work after 4 months at home with Tommy. I can fit a lot more into my day and most people are surprisingly understanding and know to wrap up anything with me before then.

I can see Tommy eventually becoming such a beach bum that we won't be able to get him to leave the beach. We were plenty busy this summer that I didn't miss the beach as much as I would have expected to considering I only got there about 3 times.

I am getting some more reading done in more recent weeks. I'm a fast reader, and once read 9 books on a week's vacation. Crazy, huh? I've been reading the same book for about 3 weeks now - The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Taking my time, enjoying it. Usually read for about 30 minutes before falling asleep when I am fitting it in. Just taking me longer to pass along to other folks the good books that I choose to read.



Mr. Tux took advantage of Mommy leaving the dryer open when Tommy woke from a nap over the weekend.


Sometimes I thought there was something else on Tommy's behind when I would look quick, but you can see it was just a cute monkey!

Tails pushing his head against the door screen and Tommy's hand


Everyone tells you that a baby/child changes your perspective on things, but I don't think I truly realized the amazing postive impact it would have on me. While I still STRESS out about some small stuff (hello, that's always been my M.O.), I know that some things that used to seem so urgent and important just aren't. I mean, sure, work is still important, but I try not to get myself too upset over things that go wrong. While I know that I have to get things done for the coming weekend's game, when it's not done at 5:00, it will still be there tomorrow morning for me. My work brain has to check out and my mommy brain is checking in. Monday I did fall back into an old pattern and had a pit in my stomach all day over something little, that someone else was making into a much bigger deal. I had a tough time letting it go. I fixed what I could fix, and had to move on. But I couldn't let.it.go. I drove home still feeling that pit. About 5 minutes from picking up Tommy, I realized that I was internalizing this whole episode which was going to make me sick, and affect my limited time with Tommy before he went to sleep. When I arrived at daycare, I can honestly say a feeling of excitement came over me, and I forgot my worries. Being greeted by Tommy when I walked into the classroom wiped away any work-related stuff from the mommy brain. I was not going to waste the limited quality time we had til bedtime worrying about work!

Of course, after he went to bed I started to get myself worked up a little bit overanalyzing things again, but I had no choice but to go into mommy-mode to get the next day's meals ready, the house picked up, and some dinner in my tummy. While I wasn't able to completely stop worrying about something out of my control, I did at least manage to control the worry to some extent, and I didn't lose any sleep over it. A few days later, and the situation seems to have been resolved and I know I got myself worked up over nothing.


Sunday night...results of self-feeding. Notice the TWO teeth?

Thank you, Tom-Tom, for being here to remind me of what is really important. Thank you, my sweet son, for helping to create this new NORMAL for me!